Getting old is noisy. No one told me that. Why doesn’t someone write a guide to all the new things your body will tell you as get past a certain age? And I don’t mean that my body gives me subtle clues to changes. I mean it has started talking out loud. I’ve been sitting on a sunny staircase at home, wondering which yoga class to do this afternoon or whether to go to the gym and do a real weight workout afterall and in the midst of this my torso – you know, the part where my abs used to be? – is gurgling and blurping as if an extra-terrestrial got trapped somehow in my lunch bowl of chicken and rice. Hello, R2-D2 in there?
Not only that, my joints creak and pop for the littlest reasons. I mean, I’m not talking cracking my knuckles here. I’m talking about shoulders, spine, wrists, neck – I’m sure people next to me in yoga wonder if I am going to pop apart.